My Cardboard Balcony

Purple by Belinda Roddie Purple balloons for my birthday party; chocolate cake as well. My wishes never come true, no matter how many times I blow the candles out. But at least the company is good, and the bubbly's even better, and the purple balloons bob up and down and make me feel like royalty.

I knew who was standing outside before I even heard the door bell, and once he was standing in the doorway, I had my shotgun loaded and ready to fire. He was wearing a poorly fitted blue suit, the hems of the jacket going all the way down to his knees. He has holding, for some reason,  a box containing a half-eaten pizza. "Hey, man," he grumbled through a mouthful of pepperoni. "Can I finish this before you shoot my brains out?"

Here are the shapes of valleys and mountains. And here are the curves of lakes and swamps. I create the texture with just my gaze - smooth, flat, sharp, and scarred. Here are the colors of sunsets and moonlight. And here are the colors of curtains and wine. Somehow, it all goes to red and black, and somehow, all of the shapes morph to circles - around and around, without any end.

WARNING: The following short story is significantly more R-rated than usual. Several references and bad puns about private parts can be found here. Please read at your own discretion. Thank you. by Belinda Roddie "'Jingle Boobs' would be a great name for a song." "..." "What? It would! Jingle boobs, jingle boobs - " "No." " Jingle all the boobs." "John, you're gay. You shouldn't be singing about boobs." "Oh, okay. Jingle boobs, jingle boobs, I am super gay..." "Oh, God." " I'm not squeezing any boobs 'cause I am super gay, hey!" "You are terrible at writing lyrics." "And you're just envious of my singing skills." "Are you kidding me? You couldn't carry a tune in a bucket if you tried." "Don't be silly, Aaron. You can't put tunes in buckets. They're tunes." "..." "Tunes...

"Dude." "What?" Shannon blinked at me. "Dude." She pointed at my character sheet. "You elf is seriously misaligned." "And why's that?" Brennan, who played a dwarf paladin, wrinkled his nose. "What's wrong with a chaotic evil elf?" "They're peaceful!" Shannon cried. "They're serene and calm and level-headed!" "Hey, Shannon?" Carly, our dungeon master, piped up. "Maybe let the elf lady go crazy on the goblins' asses, okay?"

I don't make a lot of money as a teacher. It's a fact that made me reluctant to go into education at first, and it pains me that each day, I'm paid way less than I'm actually worth. There have been times in which I've heavily debated whether or not I should switch to a job that provides me more income - of course, given my skill set and experience, it'd be a bit difficult for me to just uproot my career path and force it into a different direction. Also, I like teaching. That's because the moments I share with students are worth it, and not just in the usual "I make English interesting" or "The yearbook actually looks pretty decent" way. During one Access period this week, I took out my guitar and performed some songs in front of my English and Yearbook students. Turns out, a student shared a video of my playing and singing with her friends, stating, "Best Teacher Ever!" I've been able to sing with the teenagers I teach ...

Fragile by Belinda Roddie Carry my world in your pocket. Keep it safe. Please.