My Cardboard Balcony

Wow. Lot of stuff to cover, actually, because a lot has changed in my life, for better or for worse. So I better crack my knuckles and get started, shall I? My girlfriend, sister, and I recently moved into our new apartment, which we call The Three Broomsticks (an homage to the Harry Potter series and suggested by my friend Kyle). Let me put this out here right now and say that the place is gorgeous. It's right by the canal in the city, so you get an amazing view of the water and the boats that pass. It's getting more and more decorated and furnished each day, with bookshelves and desks and a coffee table and all that good stuff. While most of the apartment has ungrounded electricity, the surge protectors we have work, so we're not concerned about any sort of blow-out with our stuff. Our apartment manager is fantastic. Our neighbors are respectful. It's really just a good fit. The main concern I have, of course...is money, as the apartment is definitely a little exp...

Sex In The Oven by Belinda Roddie Jesus fucking Christ, I think I need skin grafts. Yes. This was, in fact, a story I wrote for my creative writing workshop class in my final semester of college. Flash fiction, indeed, at its flashiest.  And of course, it has not been edited nor modified since May 12th, 2011.

"Don't stereotype him! He might not be gay!" cried Lorraine, looking indeed very offended after the comment was made. "But he is  gay," Shawn protested. "He has a boyfriend. They went to homecoming together." "You don't know that! They might be BFFs!" "BFFs who make out behind the cardboard cut-out of John Travolta, then?" sneered Chris, though she still winced at the thought of our homecoming dance being disco-themed.