My Cardboard Balcony

by Belinda Roddie My dream job is to be the person who writes elaborate descriptions on the backs of wine bottles. Have you ever read those things? The poetry. The power. The pizzazz. And something else beginning with the letter "p." Pomp? Anyway. I have many ideas for wine distributors who want a little zest added to their labels. All they have to do is hire this writer, and their Pinots and Grigios and Emilios will be flying off the shelves in no time. Just look at these sample paragraphs I've written! Truly, masterpieces all. Full Moon (Pinot Noir) When the full moon comes out, the vines are biding their time, and the grapes are eagerly awaiting the harvest. Wait with bated breath as our wine is fermented, until it reaches your glass and stimulates your senses. Our Pinot Noir carries strong notes of vanilla and cherry, with light hints of plum. The tannins create a wonderful massage for your tongue. Perfect for beef, chicken, and sharp cheeses. Secret Valle

Father had tiled the kitchen floor, and Mother had built the toolshed. Brother had repaired the refrigerator so that Sister and he could finally drink beers that were cold. Uncle was arguing with Aunt over whether or not the place should have a gas or electrical stove, and the Token Gay Cousin was too busy texting her secret girlfriend to remember to tear out the rotten drywall in the downstairs bathroom.