My Cardboard Balcony

Ahoy There! by Belinda Roddie Ahoy there! We be headin' out to sea on three fine boats so beautiful and strong, so let the women all pine after ye as you're seduced by Lady Ocean's song. Come join the crew! Bring a bottle or six and feel the salty spray upon your cheeks. You'll learn the captain's smile and sailors' tricks and forget about dry land in a few weeks. We fight, we pillage, and we drink until our stomachs ache from all the bitter grog, and after a good battle, yes, you will feel like a true pirate deep in the fog. So find yourself a sword and climb aboard! Perhaps, one day, these three ships shall be yours.

What a looker! What a catch! She's just ripe for the taking. Don't tell me it's the vodka going straight to my head like oxygen. I am ready to tear her from that stool and carry her off to my hotel room for some sweet, sweet lovemaking. There is the prey, and I am the predator. I just make my way toward her, woo her with my charm, and all shall be - Yeah, that's how I got the bloody nose. And the broken arm. She was the predator, after all.