Tonight's Poet Corner: How To Handle A Gadfly

How To Handle A Gadfly
by Belinda Roddie

Dear Mrs. Johnson-Smith-Raymond-
Hyde-Jones-Reynolds-Maguire-Roth
(and I assume your daughter's first name
is Karen, just like yours, for the sake
of family attitude):

The board of supervisors
has instructed me not
to review your complaint,
but instead to use it as toilet
paper in the men's washroom.

I presume you'll desire
to refile it, at which point,
the women's washroom will
have spare tissue as well.
And don't forget, we have
a unisex restroom, lest you decide

that your words of bitchiness
somehow linger in our humble
little town, where we have to
deal with too many assholes
like you on a daily basis.
And no, you may not see a manager.

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