My Cardboard Balcony

by Belinda Roddie It wasn't much different each year - save for, perhaps, the type of beer he ordered, or his selection of sauces to go with his buffalo wings, or the brand of cigarettes he smoked outside while waiting for me to pay the check. Sometimes, on the drive downtown, he'd choose the radio station instead of me, or he'd hold off on using my cup holder as a makeshift ashtray until after we ate. Besides slight changes, it was always the same routine: Dinner at Langford's, before grabbing a six pack from the 5th Street Drugstore and making our way back to his condo. We were always pretty casual for Father's Day. We liked it that way. My father would have refused anything else. He was never a fancy guy, but that wasn't a bad thing; not everyone appreciates the formal shit. I sure as Hell didn't, so we fit right in at the corner booth close to the bar, ignoring the latest sportsball game while I had my typical Bleu cheese burger and my dad ordered hi...

Look above your head, and you will spot Sammy crawling across the ceiling again. She doesn't need the skills of Spiderman to do it - look, the skin on her hands naturally adheres to the plaster, but not too much, so she can move quickly. Try not to scream; this is normal in our household, and at least Sammy is never bored. It gives her poor mother a break.

It's nice to have gotten through one week of summer school. It's nice to know I'm moving into a new classroom next year and will have a studio and new computers. It's nice to return to my former town and have drinks and food with old friends who I haven't seen in a while. It's nice that I got my teeth fixed, even though they still feel a little wonky from the cleaning and fillings I needed. It's nice that I'll be able to celebrate another Father's Day with my dad by taking him to brunch and spending the day with him. ...Okay, I'm going to bed. Have a great night and a great weekend, everyone.

Existential Crisis by Belinda Roddie As we edge toward infinity, I remember the number one.

Watch the men all circle her. Watch her as they turn to planets - hardened rock and beings full of hot air, making their orbit each passing day, their revolutions jaunty and lopsided, with awkward sunsets and sunrises. She doesn't notice them. She is facing outward, toward the stars, and all the other galaxies.

I Just Wanted My Teeth by Belinda Roddie I just wanted my teeth to be pristine - healthy and strong, no inconsistencies - and I wanted them to be squeaky clean. Turns out I had two shallow cavities, so I guess my perfect record was ruined just a week before I turned twenty-nine. Also, the dentist said I was doin' a number on my teeth - the clench and grind was a plague upon me! Thus, I shelled out quite a lot of cash for some fillings and a cheap night guard, 'cause God knows with no doubt how I couldn't pay over half a grand for a professional impression. Well, a dental plan saves all my teeth from Hell.