Tonight's Poet Corner: Introspection
In a lot of ways, I'm very lucky to be where I am today. Obviously, I have a lot to do in terms of finding a teaching credential program I can afford, as well as seeking out opportunities to further supplement my income along with the hours I get at the bookstore. Money is very tight for me right now, and I have a fairly small savings account that I don't want to dive into just yet. But if you look away from the financial stuff, I am still very lucky, and not just because I can always write no matter what my situation is.
Namely, I'm talking about my relationship. My girlfriend and I have been living together for a little over three months now, and so far, it's been smooth. One thing that's been hard for me to get used to, of course, is the idea that I am not exactly bringing in a lot of money. I had daydreamed of being the one to have a job that was both enjoyable and financially comfortable; instead, I am actually relying a lot on my girlfriend for support and financial assistance. And that's weird to me. Not only because I sometimes feel guilty about asking her to pay for a lot of things like groceries, but also because I kind of wanted things to be equal.
What I'm starting to come to terms with is that my girlfriend is willing to support me because we are, truly, a partnership now. We are a solid couple who is one step away from getting a joint bank account (though I think we'll be waiting for the engagement before we do that). Her money is my money, and my money is her money. It's a concept I haven't fully adjusted to yet. Sure, I feel guilty that she has to support me when who knows what could happen to her and how much of a safety net I provide. But no matter what I say or do, her answer is always the same: We'll be okay.
And we will. I'll be okay. She'll be okay. What we have in this relationship is okay. Yes, there are things we still want to do. We want to be earning more money. We want a house some day. We want to travel and have adventures before starting a family. We have ideas and imagery for how we want our lives to progress. Will our lives follow that plan accordingly? Maybe not, but we'll sure as Hell try to make it happen.
This second week into the new year, more than ever, I am grateful for my girlfriend and the bond we've formed throughout our years together. We've come a long way from Skype chats and visits during the holidays. We're both dealing with adulthood in different ways, but we're also working together despite the contrasting elements of our lives. And that's not just refreshing to me. It's also invigorating.
Writer's Quotation of the Night:
With writing, we have second chances.
Namely, I'm talking about my relationship. My girlfriend and I have been living together for a little over three months now, and so far, it's been smooth. One thing that's been hard for me to get used to, of course, is the idea that I am not exactly bringing in a lot of money. I had daydreamed of being the one to have a job that was both enjoyable and financially comfortable; instead, I am actually relying a lot on my girlfriend for support and financial assistance. And that's weird to me. Not only because I sometimes feel guilty about asking her to pay for a lot of things like groceries, but also because I kind of wanted things to be equal.
What I'm starting to come to terms with is that my girlfriend is willing to support me because we are, truly, a partnership now. We are a solid couple who is one step away from getting a joint bank account (though I think we'll be waiting for the engagement before we do that). Her money is my money, and my money is her money. It's a concept I haven't fully adjusted to yet. Sure, I feel guilty that she has to support me when who knows what could happen to her and how much of a safety net I provide. But no matter what I say or do, her answer is always the same: We'll be okay.
And we will. I'll be okay. She'll be okay. What we have in this relationship is okay. Yes, there are things we still want to do. We want to be earning more money. We want a house some day. We want to travel and have adventures before starting a family. We have ideas and imagery for how we want our lives to progress. Will our lives follow that plan accordingly? Maybe not, but we'll sure as Hell try to make it happen.
This second week into the new year, more than ever, I am grateful for my girlfriend and the bond we've formed throughout our years together. We've come a long way from Skype chats and visits during the holidays. We're both dealing with adulthood in different ways, but we're also working together despite the contrasting elements of our lives. And that's not just refreshing to me. It's also invigorating.
Writer's Quotation of the Night:
With writing, we have second chances.
- Jonathan Safran Foer
Have a great night and a great weekend, everyone.
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