Tonight's Poet Corner: Introspection
Okay. So this is actually difficult for me to write, and I don't mean for emotional reasons. I mean that I'm totally wiped from this week. I just got back from one and a half football games at the school I work at (I left during the varsity game's halftime), since I was taking pictures for Yearbook, and while I'm now happily sated by veggie egg rolls and cream cheese rangoons...I'm just really tired, guys. I am. I'm so looking forward to a relaxing weekend - I've earned it.
Now, normally, when I'm this mentally drained, I forego the introspection and just wimp out and go, "Night, guys!" Tonight is an exception. I have so much to say despite having little energy to do it, so I'ma just stretch my fingers, take a deep breath, and try to get my whining brain to work with me and not threaten to quit as I type up this rambling nonsense.
Maybe breaking it down and keeping things brief and to the point will work. Compromise, my poor cerebral cortex? Compromise.
So first, let's get job stuff out of the way. It's been a month since I started my new job, and this week was when I really started issuing consequences to my students. For the most part, their main issue is talking during class...a lot. Not all of my English classes have this problem, but for a couple of them, the situation is so bad that I've had to push due dates of assignments earlier and double points for assignments because my students just will not shut up. The thing is, I made it clear to them in the beginning that while I'm there for them, I'm not a pushover. These students have been testing me, and now I'm showing them what happens when they call my bluff.
I even had to ask a couple of my students to leave my class for the day this week! Both apologized, but both were asked to leave because they talked back to me or disrespected me. Now, these kids I work with are around fifteen years old - they're still learning, boundaries, how to listen, and how to properly participate in and moderate discussions. I want to be able to discipline my students, but I don't want to be overly harsh. The balance is so difficult to find between strict and understanding, and as a new teacher, I have so much to juggle with that.
Doesn't help that every teacher I talk to has a different opinion on the matter. I know I have to be forgiving and let myself rethink strategies as a teacher, even in the middle of my first year. I just like being consistent, man!
Yearbook is really a story I ought to tell on its own, so we'll just skip that part. It's mostly a good experience, don't worry - lots of students to be proud of. Plus, we had a potluck today. It was lovely to just eat and bond and relax!
Okay, now to the writing stuff. I edited all of my second novel, [Insert Self-Discovery Here] (which I wrote in 2012 for NaNoWriMo), and it is now over 64,000 words. To be honest, I'm pretty proud of myself. While I haven't exactly taken on larger projects since writing The Summoner, and I especially haven't been tackling novels, I like that I can take a piece and expand it, revise it, and improve on it. I'm happy with the way I strengthened some of the book's themes and stylistic choices, and the character feel fuller and less stilted. Again, I like consistency, and that's what I strive for in my storytelling.
What I'm also happy with is my ability to branch out into different fields of art and media and creative work without boxing myself in. For a long time, I recognized that I had passions solely in three main artistic venues: Writing, acting, and musicianship. I never considered myself a visual artist (I like drawing, but I'm untrained), and I certainly didn't see myself building a skill set in digital media or design. It wasn't exactly just because I thought I wasn't capable of it; it was also because I just didn't find as much of an interest in those mediums as I did in creating stories or songs or performances.
With Yearbook, that's all changed. I'm slowly learning and adjusting to using a DSLR and taking high quality photos - and specific photos of sports events, no less. I'm discussing color palettes and fonts and page layouts. I'm even exploring the concept of shape and theme in a visual way! I've always been a lingual and musical learner, but this really does reemphasize the power of a growth mindset. None of us are static in our abilities and knowledge - we can always learn and grow as we try out different things and formulas and ideas. I think that's really cool. I enjoy being able to dabble in new categories of art; Hell, I was especially like that during high school. And I'm looking forward to what else I can absorb or study or implement in my day to day life, not just my day to day teaching.
So, yeah. I'm evolving as a human being. Who would've thought, given my ripe old age of twenty-eight?
All right. I think that's all I'm really capable of writing right now. I'm sure that if I had a bit more stamina, I could've made this introspection a bit more poetic and personal and not have it feel so rushed and mechanical. But hey, I got my thoughts out - I did the introspection thing. So I guess that means something, right?
Now time for a nice weekend. With the wifey. Cuddles and food also sound good.
Have a great night and a great weekend as well, everyone.
Now, normally, when I'm this mentally drained, I forego the introspection and just wimp out and go, "Night, guys!" Tonight is an exception. I have so much to say despite having little energy to do it, so I'ma just stretch my fingers, take a deep breath, and try to get my whining brain to work with me and not threaten to quit as I type up this rambling nonsense.
Maybe breaking it down and keeping things brief and to the point will work. Compromise, my poor cerebral cortex? Compromise.
So first, let's get job stuff out of the way. It's been a month since I started my new job, and this week was when I really started issuing consequences to my students. For the most part, their main issue is talking during class...a lot. Not all of my English classes have this problem, but for a couple of them, the situation is so bad that I've had to push due dates of assignments earlier and double points for assignments because my students just will not shut up. The thing is, I made it clear to them in the beginning that while I'm there for them, I'm not a pushover. These students have been testing me, and now I'm showing them what happens when they call my bluff.
I even had to ask a couple of my students to leave my class for the day this week! Both apologized, but both were asked to leave because they talked back to me or disrespected me. Now, these kids I work with are around fifteen years old - they're still learning, boundaries, how to listen, and how to properly participate in and moderate discussions. I want to be able to discipline my students, but I don't want to be overly harsh. The balance is so difficult to find between strict and understanding, and as a new teacher, I have so much to juggle with that.
Doesn't help that every teacher I talk to has a different opinion on the matter. I know I have to be forgiving and let myself rethink strategies as a teacher, even in the middle of my first year. I just like being consistent, man!
Yearbook is really a story I ought to tell on its own, so we'll just skip that part. It's mostly a good experience, don't worry - lots of students to be proud of. Plus, we had a potluck today. It was lovely to just eat and bond and relax!
Okay, now to the writing stuff. I edited all of my second novel, [Insert Self-Discovery Here] (which I wrote in 2012 for NaNoWriMo), and it is now over 64,000 words. To be honest, I'm pretty proud of myself. While I haven't exactly taken on larger projects since writing The Summoner, and I especially haven't been tackling novels, I like that I can take a piece and expand it, revise it, and improve on it. I'm happy with the way I strengthened some of the book's themes and stylistic choices, and the character feel fuller and less stilted. Again, I like consistency, and that's what I strive for in my storytelling.
What I'm also happy with is my ability to branch out into different fields of art and media and creative work without boxing myself in. For a long time, I recognized that I had passions solely in three main artistic venues: Writing, acting, and musicianship. I never considered myself a visual artist (I like drawing, but I'm untrained), and I certainly didn't see myself building a skill set in digital media or design. It wasn't exactly just because I thought I wasn't capable of it; it was also because I just didn't find as much of an interest in those mediums as I did in creating stories or songs or performances.
With Yearbook, that's all changed. I'm slowly learning and adjusting to using a DSLR and taking high quality photos - and specific photos of sports events, no less. I'm discussing color palettes and fonts and page layouts. I'm even exploring the concept of shape and theme in a visual way! I've always been a lingual and musical learner, but this really does reemphasize the power of a growth mindset. None of us are static in our abilities and knowledge - we can always learn and grow as we try out different things and formulas and ideas. I think that's really cool. I enjoy being able to dabble in new categories of art; Hell, I was especially like that during high school. And I'm looking forward to what else I can absorb or study or implement in my day to day life, not just my day to day teaching.
So, yeah. I'm evolving as a human being. Who would've thought, given my ripe old age of twenty-eight?
All right. I think that's all I'm really capable of writing right now. I'm sure that if I had a bit more stamina, I could've made this introspection a bit more poetic and personal and not have it feel so rushed and mechanical. But hey, I got my thoughts out - I did the introspection thing. So I guess that means something, right?
Now time for a nice weekend. With the wifey. Cuddles and food also sound good.
Have a great night and a great weekend as well, everyone.
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