My Cardboard Balcony

Iota by Belinda Roddie Little by little, I scribble the steps I've taken on a scrap of tissue paper. Then once the ink has faded or run, I plaster the mess onto my forehead for safekeeping.

I thought about buying a Ford Mustang when I went car shopping - after all, the Christmas bonus I had received from my cozy start-up job was enough for a really nice and sleek automobile, and I was admittedly in the head space of style over substance. However, when I got to the dealership, I noticed that the lights were out, and the doors were boarded shut. A cool breeze picked up around my ankles as I walked across the beaten down gray parking lot toward the shuttered entrance.

by Belinda Roddie I get bonus points for being woke in rural Scotland. I add flavor to the haggis with my social justice talkin'. Added linoleum damage for all the mikes I'm droppin'. You're just pleading for me to end it, but I ain't ever stoppin'. I'm the perennial millennial with a chip on my shoulder, still paying rent for a shit studio while I'm just getting older. Can't you find me in the highlands, where I've settled with pretending that my spirit is a fountain and the fury's never ending? Watch me lift my kilt, expose myself to Heaven and Lord Jesus, who'll avert his eyes and cry for the more rational to please us. Are my words just overkill, and my message getting garbled? I think everyone around me thinks I'm just losing my marbles. So I'll hightail it from highlands to the city, off to Glasgow, then suburbia to Edinburgh for a Guinness and a freak show. I'll pony up to gorgeous girls with accents never wilti...

'Twas an overcast day on a less than sunny May, and I was hoping for some smoking on the pier down by the bay. Just when I thought I was free, an old man came up to me, croaking like he was on some sort of lung cancer spree. So I tossed my cigarettes, saved some money on my checks, and wound chewing so much gum I pulled a muscle in my chest.

Huh. Bit of a strange week, if I say so myself. Not for the usual reason, mind you - it wasn't an emotional roller coaster. It was just...a regular roller coaster. Full of unexpected rises and dips and loop-dee-loops. Is the metaphor working? Probably not. Since my last introspection, I spent a lot of wonderful quality time with my sister and brother-in-law. We went to the fair, had a fun party with old and new friends, went out for drinks and a bite to eat - it was really nice. Then Tuesday, I did quite possibly the most ridiculous work-out I've done in a while - then promptly drove to my old town for drinks with a friend. So by Wednesday, I was exhausted. Not only was I in pain, but my feet and ankles actually swelled up and stayed that way for a couple of days after the gym. I had no inspiration to write beyond the blog, and while I did start editing a novel (by the friend I went out for drinks with), I wasn't really tackling the projects I said I would tackle this...

Chill by Belinda Roddie Even in summer, I'm frozen. And time just pushes forward.