My Cardboard Balcony

by Belinda Roddie Mawwiage. As the priest in The Princess Bride enunciated it. I am mawwied. My wife is gwand. She reminds me of twue wuv. ...That's all I got, people. Sowwy. This week's prompt was provided by Arden Roddie. Shame I couldn't manage to write a decent story for it.

My book release party was fun. I enjoyed having Monday off. My week was exhausting, but worthwhile. I continued teaching Persepolis to my seniors and Romeo and Juliet to my freshmen. I was stuck in traffic for three and a half hours yesterday because of a truck full of chickens. I did Back to School Night. My wife and I got lunch today. ...Yeah, I'm really tired. Sleep beckons. Have a great night and a great weekend, everyone.

Purr-fect Pitch by Belinda Roddie My tabby cat likes to sing opera every Sunday morning.

"So...why did you punch Jim in the nads again?" "Oh." I swallowed my lukewarm mouthfull of beer. "Because he said women were the weaker sex." "So, what, you wanted to remind him of his 'weak spot?'" "That, or I really just wanted to hear him cry." Susie raised an eyebrow. "Did he cry?" "Like a fucking baby," I chuckled.

So What Did I Do Today? by Belinda Roddie So what did I do today? Well, I botched a high five between two students after I sat in traffic for three hours and watched the time flutter by like chicken feathers - all while wearing my brand new, slick black suit (which, by the way, had to be sewn up at the left pocket of the pants. Yay). Well, shoot: I missed a class, but hey, at least I had some understanding bosses. Then, that night, I met parents of students who expressed enthusiasm for my class. All right, perhaps a better ending was addressed for this long, dragging "saga" of a day, while I can finally now hit the hay.

When I told her the truth, out of the corner of my eye, I saw my father raise his hand. For a brief, terrifying moment, I thought he was going to slap me. But he didn't. Instead, he reached for a glass on the middle shelf of the kitchen cabinet, when he then promptly filled with peanut butter-flavored whisky that he had won as a gift from a holiday raffle. My mother didn't blink at first, which caught me off guard.