My Cardboard Balcony

Common Sense by Belinda Roddie It would only be rational if I left every word of you blurred and melted on the page. If I burned every book you wrote, emptied every poisoned cup you poured, shattered every mirror you hung up with a warped reflection so that I always saw your face instead of mine. Instead, I continue to pore over each story you told. I have sipped from each chalice as if I can build immunity to your toxins. And somehow, I have become accustomed to my visage appearing to me, oddly, somewhat like yours. There is no common sense left in this house of shadows. There's no music, no dancing, no meditation or introspection. I ran out of the supply years ago, and for some reason, I don't have the strength anymore to go and find more. As if I can make my own. As if you didn't deprive me of the ingredients.

Uh-Oh by Belinda Roddie And so the cleric fell in love with the artificer.

Pride Sequel by Belinda Roddie Fuck the Fourth of July: I'm celebrating Wrath Month instead.

This week, I am not focusing on my stories, but on the stories of those whose land was stolen from them. Read these Miwok stories and legends. Then read these Wintu stories and legends. Research what native land you live on. Listen to indigenous people's stories. Keep them alive.

Nothing To Celebrate by Belinda Roddie The fireworks are already going off. But for what freedom?

Weird week. It's like both my body and brain are in flux. I'm tending to a terminally ill cat, canceling Pacific Northwest road trip plans, sleeping for hours at a time but then socializing for hours afterward, actually doing some writing beyond this blog but then stopping at a certain point, filming but then not filming, celebrating Pride as openly queer for the tenth year in a row but also getting sick and tired of rainbow capitalism... Oh, it's July now? Okay. Cool, time. Great. Have a great night and a great weekend, everyone.

Mastery by Belinda Roddie I only was saved from drowning because you taught me how to swim. However, now it's you who's being dragged down by heavy fingers coated with salt - overseasoned oceanic deity, like summer steak sitting senselessly in the sun.