My Cardboard Balcony

I wanted someone special for Christmas. I wanted someone reliable. I wanted someone I could count on - yes, that was undeniable. I wanted someone who could say the words I needed to hear every day. I wanted a person who could be consistent in their own superior way. I wanted someone who liked to have fun but who could also have serious chats. In the end, there wasn't someone for me, so for Christmas, I adopted cats.

by Belinda Roddie Can you draw me with a reindeer body? I'm tired of these same old Christmas commissions in a slinky Santa Claus outfit or assuming the form of a seductive elf helper. Let's switch up the narrative a bit and make these horny holiday artists feel weird. Human head on a scantily clad reindeer body. Now. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer would be proud of me - me and my beautiful reindeer body. Draw antlers into my curls, too - now I can pull Santa's sleigh. This week's prompt was provided by Arden Roddie.

I didn't expect Christmas to come crashing down around us, but it happened. Quite literally, in fact. It all started with the town of Burgundy witnessed its giant Christmas tree get struck by lightning during a rather violent storm. As the bark was ripped up like tissue paper, we stared in shock from our windows as the majestic trunk toppled down and strands of light burst in flares as they hit the pavement.

Wow. It's already only three days before Christmas. Finals are done. Over one hundred pages submitted for the yearbook. Already, we've opened some presents from in-laws and friends, and now, we're about to have a rather busy week. Tomorrow is my cousin's bridal shower, which actually is taking place in my town, so that's convenient. I'll get to see my sister for the first time in months, as she lives in New York. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, the wifey and I will be staying at my parents' place, and we'll be at my aunt and uncle's place for the actual holiday with about a dozen people. It'll definitely be a bigger gathering than Thanksgiving - with a baby and some dogs to hang out with, too! After that, it's Boxing Day dinner, and the day after, my sister and my brother-in-law will be having a party to celebrate both the holiday and their marriage. Needless to say, next week will be very festive and full of celebration. And I like that...

Santa Actually Hates Chimneys by Belinda Roddie You don't get it, dude - Claus is short for claustrophobic.

Oh, Mrs. Dillon, sweetie pie, the telephone is ringing! You better pick it up before the carolers start singing. It's Mr. Dillon, fat and proud, and he's got you a present. Now he is calling to also provide a Christmas message. He's saying, "Merry Christmas, darling, from your one and only. I'm happy to be seeing you tonight, or I'd be lonely." Oh, Mrs. Dillon, sweetie pie, no need to make a fuss. We're happy to let you go home - a Christmas gift from us!

Some Things by Belinda Roddie Some things at Christmas time are worth the stress and all the crazy bustle as the days breeze by, and the weather's tepid at best. The goddess of the winter has her ways of making fires in the hearth as bright as starlight, and so warm and inviting. And as the afternoon turns into night, the family I keep will form a ring around the embers, while the Christmas tree maintains its gleam despite its drying bones. We find love in between the jubilees. We find peace when we're busy heaving stones to tops of hills. Our burdens will somehow stay heavy, but we ignore them for now.